Uncharted Bliss – Argentina and Great Britain (Part 43)

Transposing emblem by Javier Gómez
“Maturity, one discovers, has everything to do with the acceptance of ‘not knowing’.” ― Mark Z. Danielewski, House of Leaves
Buenos Aires, Argentina – Between

We are instructed to build our lives to avoid uncertainty on every possible level. Even in our childhood, one of the most frequent questions we are asked is “What do you want to be when you grow up?” We are urged to plot a course for our future and walk that path without deviation. We fear the unknown, perhaps more than anything else. While that emotion manifests itself on a very basic level as our fear of the dark, it is certainly present in every aspect of our existence. We can tolerate a Monday to Friday job because we more or less know what to expect from our daily routine, and the weekend is always waiting for us.

Argentina – Neutral

On less obvious levels, the unknown is also the enemy. If we don’t know the answer to a question, we often try to concoct it instead of simply admitting our ignorance. In social situations, we try to come across as knowledgeable and witty, and it’s easier to smile and nod if we have no clue about what’s being discussed. Perhaps that’s why we hoard data and facts and trivia in our heads compulsively, yet we fail to invest time in getting to know ourselves. We close many doors without even peeking behind them, especially when it comes to our minds and personalities. For years, I created an identity based on what I do for a living and the various forms of art that I enjoy. I surrounded myself with people who behaved in a similar way, and we were all perched in our mountain of absolutisms and hyperboles, looking down on everyone and everything that didn’t fit into our sphere of interest. Almost without realizing it, I had become what I hated the most: an arrogant, smug intellectual who hid all his insecurities behind sarcasm and irony. Cheers to me.

London, UK – A blur

As time went on, the road took me to different countries and cultures and the know-it-all façade started to crack. It was slow at first, some instances of “maybe,” “huh,” and “I didn’t know that” started to pop-up in my speech. I could no longer have long discussions about people and places that I only knew from books or websites. I started questioning social axioms. I left my 100% science-oriented mind and started to dabble in a more holistic point of view about the world, health and well-being. Meditation replaced medication and I started fighting causes instead of symptoms. I took a deep dive into uncertainty about myself, my career, my whole life.

London, UK – Wondering

During that process, a pattern started to emerge. Whenever I had no idea about something, be it a person, a place or an activity, my old self fought to re-emerge and tried to form a mental image of it based on what I thought I knew. I had to remind myself that in order to learn, I needed to admit that I didn’t have the answers. I had to face the fact that I was either wrong or uninformed about a plethora of subjects, and that was great because it left room for growth.

La Plata, Argentina – Bi…

Several years passed and I became too comfortable in my new point of view. I knew who I was, I knew what my profession was and I thought I knew how I wanted to live. Except that I really didn’t, and I didn’t know I didn’t. In May 2017, someone very important for me died. She was my grandmother, but she was always a sort of inadvertent philosophical teacher. As it usually happens, I didn’t process it right away. I kept going with my daily routine for several months until a New Year’s trip to Scandinavia gave me time to ponder existence while contemplating frozen, desolate landscapes. And thus I found out that something was off. That the death of the wisest woman I have ever known had hit me harder than I wanted to admit because it forced me to look closer at what I was doing with my time. And the answer was that I wasn’t sure.

London, UK – Outside

Uncertainty had painted all the roadmaps. I entered full existential crisis mode; something that I thought only had a place in my teenage years. You know that hollow feeling when you stare through the window and everything looks gray and half-dead? Well, I do live in England and it’s usually gray here, but you get the idea. It took me several months to understand that I had to embrace the magic of not having a clue in order to understand it. What do I want to do? Who do I want to be? Will I have a different answer tomorrow? I still don’t know, but I’m happy with it because it means I can be anything I like for as long as I want.

London, UK – Black and orange

Uncertainty shouldn’t necessarily mean being afraid. It can also mean flexibility of thought, of ideas, of emotions. Your path does not need to be a straight line set from the get-go. And I already knew it, but I didn’t really know it. I still struggled to hold on to certainty because it was safer. Even in a freelance life, I had found a routine and a set of relatively unchangeable aspects that defined a comfort zone. We are all programmed to do that, but we also know that we can change it. Is it easy? No, it’s not. Is it fun? It can be if you allow it. At least I know it’s a better use of your time than wondering how that trip, that job, that activity or that place would be while you tell yourself that now is not the right moment to try it. But what do I know? I am full of uncertainty.

Javier Gómez

Credits

Photo 1: Andino, Argentina – Straight ahead – Esteban Trivelli

Photo 2: Buenos Aires, Argentina – Between – Julian Gentilezza

Photo 3: Argentina – Neutral – Brad Lloyd

Photo 4: London, UK – A blur – kamilpetran

Photo 5: London, UK – Wondering – Keith Camilleri

Photo 6: La Plata, Argentina – Bi… – Brad Lloyd

Photo 7: London, UK – Outside – Clem Onojeghuo

Photo 8: London, UK – Black and orange – Kid Circus

Locations

Home: www.perypatetik.net

Social: www.facebook.com/Perypatetik

Cinemblem: Perypatetik youtube channel


The Codex of Uncertainty Transposed

Awdejuk, Pawel. Niepewność – The Road to Freedom – Poland. July 2018.

Bell, Sarah. The Bushfire Drive – Australia. July 2018.

Bondarenko, Evgeny. Twenty Plus Years. August 2018.

Cajoto, Christina. The Trajectory of Life – España. August 2018.

Castañeda, Martha Corzo. Worried Workers – Peru. February 2018.

Cooleridge, Tweeney. Uncertainty in the Abstract – Slovakia. March 2018.

Cordido, Veronica. The Crib of Uncertainty – Venezuela. January 2018.

Dastan, S.A. Uncertain Waters – Turkey. March 2019.

Deiana, Sara. The Dark Side of Perfection. September 2018.

Electra P. Aβεβαιότητα: The Enemy of Romantic Relationships – Greece. February 2018

Escandell, Andrea da Silva. Compromise – Uruguay. March 2018

Fischer, Kristin. Talking about Cancer – Germany. September 2018.

Goumiri, Abdennour. Uncertainty Is All There Is – France. February 2018.

Guerrero, Marilin. Crossing the Uncertain Path of Life – Cuba. February 2018.

Guillot, Iuliana. Preparing for Change – Romania. June 2018.

Huihao, Mu. Going the Uncertain Way. July 2017.

Julber, Lillian. What Will Tomorrow Bring? – Chile. July 2018.

Kanunova, Nigina. Metamporphoses in Modern Life. June 2018.

Konbaz, Rahaf. So You Say You Want A Revolution – Syria. March 2018.

Korneeva, Kate. One We – Russia. April 2018.

Krnceska, Sofija. No Name Country – Macedonia. May 2018.

Lassa, Verónica. The Old Eastern Books of Uncertainty – Argentina. May 2018.

Lozano, Gabriela. El cuchillo de la incertidumbre : Piercing Uncertainty – México. January 2018.

Pang, Lian. Now or Later? October 2018.

Phelps, Jade. Healing Journey Pulls Us Apart – America. June 2018.

Protić, Aleksandar. Environmental Uncertainty. August 2018.

Romano, Mavi. An Uncertain Democracy – Spain. April 2018

Ranaldo, Mary. Incerto or Flexible: Italia and UK. March 2018.

Çakır, Peren. Building a Future in Times of Uncertainty – Argentina and Turkey. May 2018.

Sanmartín, Virginia. Qué Será, Será – Spain. June 2018.

Samir, Ahmed. Uncertainty in Personal Life. January 2018.

Sekulić, Jelena. Nesigurnost of the Past, Present and Future – Serbia. June 2018.

Sem, Sebastião. Vagrant Poets. September 2018.

Sepi, Andreea. Uncertainties Galore – Germany. April 2018.

Sitorus, Rina. When Uncertainty Reaches the Land of Certainty – Indonesia and the Netherlands. May 2018.

Trojnar, Kamila. Ephemeral. October 2018.

Quintero, Jonay. The Fear of Not Knowing – España. January 2018.

Uberti, Alejandra Baccino. Adventure – Uruguay. September 2018.

Vuka. Lacking Uncertainty in Political Culture – Serbia. April 2018.

Wallis, Toni. Living for Today – South Africa. October 2018.

Younes, Ghadir. Economic Uncertainty in Life – Lebanon. Part 38.

Zakharova, Anastasiya. LGBQT – Russia. August 2018.

Forthcoming

Translators and writers from Lebanon, India, Croatia, Brazil, Mexico and other parts of the world…

Source: The Codex of Uncertainty Transposed

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