I: Have you ever felt that powerful energy called hatred?
Myself: I don’t know if it’s hatred or not, but sometimes I wish I could kill someone. I feel they are absolutely unfair and that I deserve better.
I: What do you do then?
Myself: Before, I was trembling with my whole body. I was making up stories in my head about how I could get revenge on that person. Now, it’s different. I stop for a moment and picture that person in my head. “Can I accept this person the way they are?” I ask myself. And if the answer is “no,” I delve deeper into the sensation. Why is it that I have this energy? Do I want fairness? Do I want kindness? What do I want? If it is the evil that I resist so much, I try to accept evil as part of the universe. Whether we want it or not, we have both negative and positive energies on this planet earth. And if we want to continue in peace, we need to accept both. So I stop for a moment and ask myself, “Can I accept evil as part of the universe? Can I let it go?” The last question is magical as you just let go of that energy. You may be amazed, but sometimes this simple question does wonders. I just let go of the energy and feel free.
I: Does it always work?
Myself: Sometimes the same question comes back again and again. It means I did not fully let go of the negative energy. I really want to accept life in its diversity, and evil is part of the diversity. If I sense the feeling returning to me, it means I have to work on it more. Eventually, very few things will bother you. For example, the other day the shopkeeper was mean to me. I was pleasantly surprised that it did not bother me. It was pleasing, but it was also funny, because the shopkeeper lost her power over me. I felt that. I felt out of control. That is a very pleasing thing to realize. You are not affected by the good or bad. You are what you are, and that’s the end of the story. Isn’t that cool?
Myself: What is ego?
I: Ego is your whole self with all your emotions, ideas, inclinations and whatever is part of “me.”
Myself: Is it possible to be egoless?
I: Yes, it is, but very few people accomplish that.
Myself: I don’t want to be egoless. I want my “me” part. I want to feel that “I am.”
I: It depends on what you understand under “I am.” If you understand it to be the whole story in your head that runs on and on, and you want to continue telling that story to yourself as if it is real, then you need to keep your ego. Do you really want that?
Myself: I don’t think so. The stories in my head are not true stories. They are made up by me in order to satisfy some needs that I have on an emotional level. As such, they are deprived of the true sense of reality. They are not “real.” They are “imaginary.” I understand this, but I also don’t know what “real” is. That’s why I am shifting from the imaginary world to the real world, and I don’t know what I belong to.
I: The trick is super simple. Leave aside all these ideas, emotions, sensations, wants, likes and dislikes and focus on the space where they happen. Can you do that? Try it. There is a deeper background where all of these sensations reveal themselves. Focus on that. Can you do it?
Myself: I will try. I can feel something like a mother. Something that engages in caring. Something that protects.
I: Do you feel protected?
Myself: Yes, I feel safe.
I: That is called awareness. Your true self is awareness. This is a space where all the happenings of life unfold. You are not the scenarios. You are the space where the scenarios play out. Can you feel that?
Myself: It’s so close to me. It’s so familiar. It seems I have known it all my life.
I: It was with you all your life. It’s always accepting. Always there. It’s accepting even your non-acceptance. It’s patient. It will wait for you in this and other lives until you get to it. It will never rush you, waiting until you come to the realization of your true self. You are the space. You are the awareness. Enjoy that. That’s so pleasing for the heart. There is no fight in the space – only acceptance. There is no resistance. No fight. No contradictions. The energy flows like a river to one end.
Myself: I feel that. I think I feel that one moment, and then the next I lose it.
I: At the beginning you will lose the feeling from time to time. Focus on that every time something bothers you or you recall it. In time, it will become your second nature and you will live in awareness. In awareness there is no ego.
(…to be continued…)
Transadaptation Volume 4 – Material Dissent
January: A Blinding Light and Then, All Darkness – Jonay Quintero Hernández (Spain)
February: The Opportunist – Lauren Voaden (United Kingdom)
March: A Stranger in my City – Alejandra Baccino (Uruguay)
April: A South African Soundtrack – Sarah-Leah Pimentel (South Africa)
May: Full Circle – Ina Maria Vogel (Germany)
June: La Lluvia en Bogotá – Adriana Uribe (Columbia)
July: Freedom – Krisztina Janosi (Hungary)
August: A Bus Ride – Svetlana Molchanova (Russia)
September: Transcendence – Armine Asryan (Nane Sevunts) (Armenia)
October: Motherhood – Marilin Guerrero Casas (Cuba)
November: Nine Days – Gennady Bondarenko (Ukraine)
December: Open – Seyit Ali Dastan (Turkey)
Background – Context
Transadaptation Volume 3: Evanescent – Young Adulthood Transadapted, (eds.) Angelika Friedrich, Yuri Smirnov and Henry Whittlesey (2022)
Transadaptation Volume 2: Conceived – Childhood Transadapted, (eds.) Angelika Friedrich, Yuri Smirnov and Henry Whittlesey (2021)
Transadaptation Volume 1: In the Middle – Prelude to a Contemporary Transadaptation, (eds.) Angelika Friedrich, Yuri Smirnov and Henry Whittlesey (2020)
Peripatetic Alterity: A Philosophical Treatise on the Spectrum of Being – Romantics and Pragmatists by Angelika Friedrich, Yuri Smirnov and Henry Whittlesey (2019)
La Syncrétion of Polarization and Extremes Transposée, (eds.) Angelika Friedrich, Yuri Smirnov and Henry Whittlesey (2019)
The Codex of Uncertainty Transposed, (eds.) Angelika Friedrich, Yuri Smirnov and Henry Whittlesey (2018)
L’anthologie of Global Instability Transpuesta, (eds.) Angelika Friedrich, Yuri Smirnov and Henry Whittlesey (2017)
From Wahnsinnig to the Loony Bin: German and Russian Stories Transposed to Modern-day America, (eds.) Angelika Friedrich, Yuri Smirnov and Henry Whittlesey (2013)
Emblems and stories on the international community
Perception by country – Transposing emblems, articles, short stories and reports from around the world
Credits (left side, middle – top to bottom, right side)
1. Syunik, Armenia – The cliffs – Ani Adigyozalyan (Unsplash), 2. Tatev, Armenia – Tatev Monastery – Anie Arstamyan (Unsplash), 3. Syunik, Armenia – In the mountains – Ani Adigyozalyan (Unsplash), 4. Tavush, Armenia – Transcendence – Karine Avetisyan (Unsplash), 5. Lori, Armenia – Mountain grazing – Aram Grigoryan (Unsplash), 6. Armenia – Gora Arailer – Aram Grigoryan (Unsplash), 7. Goris, Armenia – Ephemeral – Mushegh Hakobyan (Unsplash), 8. Armenia – Monastery Valley – Ivars Utinans (Unsplash)
Source: The Codex of Uncertainty Transposed