The Test
Alejandra Baccino
She got off the bus and started walking home absentmindedly, not seeing the bike that missed her by a few inches, nor the look of the passersby who registered her glassy eyes with a mixture of curiosity and concern. It had been a long-hard day, and all she could think about was getting home, and putting her feet up.
It was funny to her now that a while back she had had things figured out. But that was before the dictatorship took the country by surprise (or at least that is what all the politicians had said). Alex didn’t care about that. She just wanted to relax. Things had finally started getting better after many years of uncertainty, and now it was time to rebuild the country. Although what she really wanted was some sort of stability and peace of mind.
She arrived at her studio apartment in a not-so-nice area of the city, and went straight to the sofa bed. She put on her headphones to drown out the noise of her wanna-be punk band neighbors and started drifting off to sleep, slowly and calmly.
Alex woke up to the noise of the construction work close by. The construction had been going on for months already and they would always start using the machinery whenever she was having a well-deserved rest.
As a 27-year-old woman, she considered herself mature enough to be independent and pay her bills, although she would suddenly have fits over being completely lonely and scared at times. After 3 years, she had finally decided to put an end to her previous relationship with a good person who was just not good for her anymore.
Nothing had really happened, they had just unconsciously gone their separate ways until one day, with no pain and no anger, they had decided to put an end to it. It’s only fair to say that the decision hadn’t been entirely Alex’s, nor even 50-50. In fact, Alex was not really aware that they had been drifting apart until Joanna said she just didn’t miss her anymore. Nonetheless, always proud, Alex realized that no matter how much they’d care for each other, there was no point in fighting over someone who didn’t want to be fought for… even though she was sure she’d regret the decision. Alex had no way of knowing if that was true, and deep down she suspected it wasn’t, but blind as she had been to the whole thing, it was what she needed to think to cope with the situation.
The first few months were pretty bad. Alex did not recognize herself. It was as if all joy had been taken away from this world. She forced herself to continue working and studying, even if she would stay up feeling miserable most of the night. However, despite her efforts, she was still struggling with work and school. She really did want to graduate, and her professors had been more than patient and helpful, but still, her full-time waitressing left her too exhausted to be able to focus much on her legal studies.
“Hey! Wait up,” Alex heard someone shout. She was not paying much attention to her surroundings, so she kept on walking, ignoring the slightly familiar voice and calculating what grade she needed to get on her next final to avoid having to take the exam. The calculation went nowhere, as her friend, Mariana, caught up to her.
“Hey! What are you up to? I’ve been chasing you for the past 2 blocks! I know I said I wanted to get in shape, but I didn’t mean like this!” Mariana said, laughing at her own joke as if it were the funniest thing anyone had ever said.
“I wish I were so happy,” Alex thought, before immediately dismissing it. She knew Mariana had her own issues to deal with and that she tried hard to be a supportive friend. How had everything changed so quickly?
“I’m sorry. I’m just trying to figure out how to get an A in Statistics when I don’t understand why Chi is squared or when I keep confusing the mean with the median! That’s the lowest score I need to pass the class, and there’s no way I can get all that info into my brain!” Alex blurted in exasperation.
Mariana was aware of how hard these last few years had been for Alex. Of course, there was the whole issue of coming out to her friends and family, which was always an important event in someone’s life, irrespective of the outcome. Unfortunately, Alex’s family hadn’t taken it very well. There were no hurtful words, no tears, but something changed in their relationship and in time both sides felt it was too late. Luckily for Alex, her friends, although few, were accepting and open. They were so excited for her. The first thing they did was set her up with different people, and, although an introvert to the extreme, she made an effort to go on these dates, as she couldn’t believe how lucky she was.
Right around this time, she had decided to go back to University. She had started her nursing degree years ago, but she was forced to quit when the de facto government took charge before she finished. However, this time, there was no one to support her financially. Still, she was not a quitter.
Alex and Mariana sat next to a tree for their lunch break. It was the month of November, almost summer in the southern hemisphere, and everyone was studying for their finals. Mariana was also studying to become a nurse, and what brought them together was not their shared love for the career, but business. Let’s say business in the broad sense of the word, because in reality, Alex was looking for something Mariana offered. During their first year of school, nursing students were required to learn and practice how to insert intravenous lines, and, of course, they would be tested on their technique. As panic swept over the students afraid there were going to fail and look incompetent, Mariana saw an opportunity. She contacted a few older students and ones in other degree programs, offering to pay them if they gave a fellow student two attempts to insert an IV. A few brave students accepted the offer, and Mariana started offering this service to her peers in exchange for a small fee, which included a percentage for administrative charges (that went straight to her pocket).
“Excuse me?” Alex had said to a bright and perky Mariana, unsure if she was the right person. She had overheard a classmate speaking about a girl who would let you practice on a real arm in exchange for a few pesos, but Alex was not entirely sure if it was real or a joke. She was so scared, she decided to find out. She asked around and word had it that the mastermind behind this plan was a first-year student with curly hair and a bit of an attitude. She did not see any attitude, she was actually quite nice, but Alex knew that someone who created such a plan must be more than just a pretty and cordial face.
“Yes? Can I help you?” Mariana asked, studying her face. She knew that although there wasn’t anything illegal in principle, her business would not be accepted and likely not tolerated by school officials. She had tried to do everything online with different means of communication, but still some clueless students would pop up eventually, asking for the organizer. Most people thought it must be a guy behind it, and although it made her feel that her identity was safe, it was still very annoying as she was very proud of her whole plan.
“Uh, maybe. We are both in our first year, although you probably don’t know me. I thought that if you are as lost as I am with the IV lines, maybe we could practice on each other?” – Alex had started talking to her without looking in her eyes and with a bit of uncertainty. However, now she looked straight at Mariana, making sure to clearly articulate the last two words.
Mariana was taken aback. She had seen Alex in a few classes and had not really thought about her much. She was usually alone but seemed friendly and smart, although she preferred not to answer in class. However, she liked the proposition; everyone was very much willing to pay, but no one had gone as far as to offer their own arm in return. Alex had just become much more interesting, and Mariana was very much intrigued.
“Uh… you poke mine and I poke yours?” Mariana asked matter-of-factly.
“Uh huh,” replied Alex with some hesitation.
“Alright, cool! I’ll get some Abbocaths from the lab. Are you able to get some too? Probably not too thick as I don’t want to be walking around with wholes in my body!”– Once again in what would become her signature laugh and brighten up Alex’s days for the following years, Mariana tilted her head back as if she’d made the funniest joke in the entire world.
Just like that, they became friends.
Now, winding their way toward the end of school, while Mariana chomped fries and went on about her plans for the summer, Alex had started to freak out about the final. She had really tried to study and follow the classes, but she was always so tired that whenever she sat down to review the material, she would fall asleep on her notes.
“Nothing more than the beach and a good book, and I’m the happiest person on earth,” Mariana was saying about her future plans. But suddenly she stopped as she saw a thought forming on Alex’s face, a scary yet intriguing thought. “Alex. Want to share what’s on your mind?” she asked.
“Huh? Uhm… not really, no. What beach are you going to?” Alex replied with a forced smile.
“If I didn’t know you so well, I might have thought that was an awful attempt to change the subject,” Mariana replied amused. “Come on, miss, spit out what’s on your mind.”
“Okay, but you must promise to take it to the grave,” said Alex. “I’m going to cheat.”
“On who?” Mariana asked, while wondering how she could not know her friend was dating someone.
“What?” Alex replied confused for a second, and then, lowering her voice to a whisper, she added, “on the test.”
“Oh… it’s that bad?” Mariana replied concerned. “I’m sorry. I thought you were exaggerating a bit. We can study together; I’m not that well prepared myself, but we could help each other out.”
“No, I can’t fail, I can’t. If I don’t get an A, I will have to take the exam and I won’t be able to work during the summer and I need the money. I’m three months behind on the rent and I’ll get evicted if I don’t pay up. Getting less than an A means taking make-up classes in the summer, I just can’t afford it,” – Alex added with watery eyes.
Mariana had not realized how worried Alex was or how serious the situation had become. She would have loved to lend her money, but she didn’t work, except for the occasional gig doing odd jobs. She had offered to let Alex stay at her place a few times, especially during the winter because she knew Alex was way too stubborn to turn on the heat, but she’d never suspected her friend was close to eviction, or worse, that they wouldn’t graduate together.
While both digested Alex’s statement, their brains were already at work. Mariana was proud of her pragmatism and business mentality. It was the reason why many of her professors suggested she pursue a career in nursing management instead. She loved budgets and she was fond of power, but overall, she had a sense of fairness and leadership that, combined, were able to look at things from a pragmatic perspective without forgetting the final purpose, in this case, helping her friend.
Alex, however, was an introvert and a very sensitive person. She was a people pleaser to the point where she would put other’s well-being before her own. She had a strong character; not many people would have been able to go through what she went through and still choose such a noble profession, but sometimes she found it hard not to stray from the rules. What united them, was what they most treasured about each other and themselves – they were unstoppable.
“I could wear a skirt and put a paper on the inside, and fold it whenever you need to check something,” Mariana said. But Alex immediately dismissed the idea, “Stupid idea, I cannot rely on being seated next to you or put you in such a position.”
“I know!” Mariana exclaimed. “Since we are not allowed to have our pencil cases on the table, you can create the cheat sheet on a tiny bit of paper and slide it inside a pen! It’s visibly invisible. No one will be expecting that, therefore, no one will be looking for it. Those are the smartest tricks,” she added convinced, waiting for a reaction.
“Yeah, it sure sounds like a great idea…until the teacher asks me why I am staring at my pen as if I could get the answers from it, so, until he realizes that’s exactly what I’m doing!” – she suddenly burst out laughing, incredulous at how low she’d gone and surprised at her own perceptibility.
“Okay, okay, fair enough. How much are you willing to risk it?” Mariana asked, as an idea formed in her head.
“I’m all in,” Alex replied without a doubt in her mind.
“Okay. So you do this. Water is the only liquid we are allowed to bring, in a clear bottle. And, we all know the trick of sloppily writing something on the white part of the label and reading through the bottle. That’s just stupid and teachers are aware of it. But, they don’t ever pay any attention to the labels. So, you will need a good printing place for this, somewhere far away from the university. First, write up a summary of what you’ll need, obviously, keep it as short as possible. Then, design a label trying to copy one of the known brands. Choosing the same design, the same color, and even adding the logo to make it pass as the usual brand. Then, instead of the description of the water, where it comes from and so on, you start copy-pasting your notes. In the slogan, the table of nutrition facts, the copyright, everything from the original label, you substitute with your notes. You will need close attention to detail, you’ll need to change fonts, colors, sizes; you’ll need to print it several times to adjust the graphics. It won’t be fast or easy. My suggestion, it’s easier and safer to study; but you’ve made up your mind.” As she said this, Mariana stopped for a second and looked at Alex. She had tried to scare her a bit with all the exposure required by her trick, but was surprised to find that Alex was following her instructions closely, without a hint of doubt. “Do you understand what I mean?” she added.
“I do. I got it!” Alex said firmly as she got up. Her body had left a mark on the grass where she was seated, along with the grass she had anxiously ripped out with her hands while thinking. “If I’m going to do this, I have to start now. Speak later.”
Mariana was a bit surprised at Alex’s rudeness; after all, it had been her idea. Not that she’d put it into practice; but still. She wished she had realized Alex was struggling with this subject before so she could have helped her. Mariana felt like she had tried to help her now, but deep inside she knew that by coming up with this idea she was helping no one. Even worse, if Alex were to get caught, she would be expelled. She walked home, trying to convince herself that Alex was a grown woman and well aware of the consequences; but the awkward feeling didn’t leave her.
She didn’t see Alex for the next two days. She had called her and even gone to the restaurant to try to convince her not to cheat, but she couldn’t find her. It was not much of a surprise since Alex worked rotating schedules and was always covering for someone who hadn’t shown up.
As soon as the class before Statistics was over, Mariana walked straight to the exam room, without stopping to eat or go to the restroom. She couldn’t even bring herself to take out a bottle of water. She waited for Alex outside the classroom. She would beg if need be, she would cry, anything not to let her compromise her own future. Alex had fought so hard to be where she was, and was so close to graduating, it was not worth the risk. How could she have been so stupid and so driven by her own desire to impress her with her cleverness. She hadn’t been aware that Alex would actually go through with it!
The first bell rang, and quickly, all her classmates found their way into the classroom. She could see Alex’s usual seat empty, “Where was she?” she asked herself. She hoped she’d come up with a credible excuse, a health issue or something. As the second bell rang, marking the start of the class, she walked to her seat with a look of defeat. Suddenly, as she glanced up, she saw Alex talking with the teacher. The teacher did not look pleased, and Mariana had never seen Alex talk so much and so fast. Had she been caught? Was she now trying to defend herself with some lame excuse no one would believe? Seriously, who’d believe someone that had gone through all that trouble! That’s it. She could see herself graduating alone, with a look of resentment on Alex’s face. She didn’t’ know what to do, what to say.
Suddenly, Alex smiled. That completely caught Mariana off guard. Not only that, Alex smiled, and then left the classroom.
Mariana was in complete disbelief but tried to focus on the final anyways. Those were the longest 50 minutes of her life.
When the bell rang, she turned in the final and was thinking about ways to apologize while grabbing her things. She didn’t even notice her backpack was open. She just wanted to find Alex and try to make sense of the whole situation.
“Marian!” Alex said, with a smile from ear to ear. “Here, come!”
“What is going on? I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have given you any ideas! I’m a terrible friend, I should have helped you study, not give you ideas to copy! I’m so, so sorry! Did they expel you? They did, didn’t they! And it’s all my fault!” Mariana replied, without stopping to breathe in between sentences.
“It is.” Alex said seriously. “It was all your idea, indeed,” she added smiling. She’d tried to prank her friend but she could see how much she was suffering.
“What happened?” Mariana asked as she caught her breath.
“You gave me the idea, really.” Alex confirmed. “I was convinced that I would have to cheat; I couldn’t see any other way out. However, while you went on with your ideas, I realized I would not be able to go through with it. I would probably just start crying and confess in the first five minutes!” – She laughed with so much ease that Mariana was astonished. “That’s when I realized that my issue was not not understanding statistics, but applying them by heart. The smartest thing would have been to talk to the teacher, but there was not enough time and they might see it as an excuse. So, using your idea, I wrote an essay analyzing the statistics of cheating and applying them to that test. OK, I know that I may have made the teacher more aware of it, but I didn’t think of that at the moment. I analyzed the median, the average, I also did a historical comparison and even proposed a double-blind sort of study to apply to the learning and testing of statistics. That’s when you entered the class and saw me. I was defending myself. I was actually explaining my thesis and how to disprove it. I realized statistics is actually very useful and not at all impossible, I just needed to apply it to something real. I had to explain my situation to the teacher, of course, but after he saw that I had really understood the purpose, and how upset the whole situation made me; he said he would accept it instead of the test! I’m not out of the woods yet, I still need to get an A, but I’m so happy about the alternative idea!”
“All good, all good… I wished you’d tell me something though. I nearly went to the teacher and confessed that I had told you to cheat, and how!” Mariana said, quite upset. She was happy for her friend but she’d been so worried and felt so guilty!
“I know, I know. And I am sorry. I wasn’t sure it would work. With everything that’s been going on these last few years, I didn’t want to fail again. I needed this to know what type of person I am, what I can handle and, especially, what type of nurse I want to be in the future. I know I should have kept you in the loop and I’m sorry about that. But, if it’s any consolation, I did tell the teacher it was all your idea, and he said he’d consider giving you extra credit for your selflessness.” Although Alex felt like a failure sometimes, she was proud of her decision to give credit to her friend. Not because it had actually been her idea, but because throughout all these years, she’d been there for her, poking her in the arm, casually inviting her to warm meals at her place, and even designing a masterplan to cheat.
“Well, I cannot not take that into consideration” Mariana replied, excited about the prospect of receiving extra credit for letting her imagination run wild. “However, you should have told me. Although, next time you want me worrying sick like this, it better be at least because we’re robbing a bank. Not that I don’t trust the plan, it’s just that my executioner has a conscience!” Again, as always, Mariana laughed as if it were the funniest joked in the world, and that day, to Alex, it was.